In Defense of Running Down Pedestrians

Aw, now Debz has made a comment that makes me feel like a bad person. So let me clarify. I am not for gunning the engine when you see granny crossing at the crosswalk a block ahead. Nor simply running over junior if he chases his ball out into the street in front of your vehicle. What I can’t stand are people who attempt to cross in the middle of the road, in a 45 mph speed zone- by simply walking out in front of my car. If you don’t stop fast enough, they’ll glare you down. I had a woman literally bang on the hood of my car and curse at me. Beyond that, it’s the attitude. “I live in a city, I can just walk across the street and stop traffic when ever I get the whim to see what the other side of the road looks like.” No. You do not live in the “city.” If anyone tried that trick in a “city” they would be mowed down by a cab (there’s a hit for you, “cities” have actual cabs) or some other city dweller that helpfully decided to help you end your life. In a city you do not simple walk out in front of traffic. You time it, you gracefully weave- you become a part of the traffic. And it’s safe because everyone knows what they are doing: you are in charge of you and I am in charge of me. When you try to be helpful and stop your car dead in the street for me to pass, I don’t know what the hell is going on. These Minnesotans have no rhythm, and their system of demanding “nice” is so much nastier than simply being happy when nice finds you.